Stolen

When I see your face, there's not a thing that I would change because you're amazing just the way you are.

Candid Camera

Sometimes, no matter how often you smile, no matter how hard you try, you just can't shake the sadness that follows you through every moment. Sometimes, all the good news in the world isn't enough to lift your soul out of the gutter. All the friends in the world aren't enough to make you any less lonely. Today, I think, is one of those times.

Lean On Me

Remember to smile. Remember to laugh. Remember to keep your chin up. I know you feel down, but there's a light at the end of the tunnel. You just have to persevere and reach it. When you're not strong, I'll be here. I'll carry you the entire way if you ask me to.

Blast From the Past

"Your beauty is so much more than physical. Your mind makes you sexy. Your humour makes you tempting. Your intelligence makes you irresistible."

I wrote that a few months ago. I'm amazed at my eloquence. But what really grabbed my attention is how true it is. There's no one I've seen who can match your physical beauty and I'm convinced that they don't exist, but your true attractiveness comes from who you are. Your mind, humour and intelligence are just the tip of the iceberg. Your strength of will, your determination, your sheer tenacity in the face of adversity. All these and more add up to the sum of the most amazing woman in existence.

Damn homie, I'm so lucky to know you.

Dear Friend

When I am with you, you turn bad days into good days. You turn good days into great days. You turn great days into the best days of life.

When I am with you, your smile warms my heart. You laughter lifts my spirits. Your mere presence is enough to set me at ease. Everything is okay when I am with you.

When I am with you, I am happy. I can live happy and I can die happy.

When I am with you.

Wildest

The girl of my dreams has nothing on you.

Damn homie.

And Ever

Yeah. Yeah I am jealous. Who wouldn't be? Look at you. Gorgeous. Sexy. A bombshell. I'm luckier than every man but one, and I wasn't what he has. I want it so bad. No, I'm not just talking about that. I'm definitely including it, but not it alone. He has your heart. He has your body. He has you.

I want you.

Okay... Enough of that. Back to the dark corners of my mind. As long as you belong to someone else, I cannot let those feelings to the surface. This was far too much as it is.

Please forgive my ever hopeful heart.

I love you.

Yup

Hmm... It's 2am and I can't sleep. I'm starting to regret hanging out in my car until midnight. 7am is approaching quickly. Damn.

Tomorrow

Shitty end to an awesome day, but an awesome day indeed.

Thanks to you.

Thank you. I love you. Goodnight.

Grip

These memories I have. They warm my heart. You'd probably prefer to forget many of them, but for me, I hold onto them as tightly as I can.

One memory in particular just came to me last night. I had forgotten it ever happened until I thought of it then. Now it may be my favorite memory of you, though it's probably one of those you'd rather forget. But I will carry it with me as long as humanly possible.

Damn, you're amazing.

Holy--

I have a permanent smile on my face. I have the best friends a guy could ever ask for. And yes, you're at the top of that list.

What spawned this particular post, you ask? Just a few texts I received last night that shot my heart into my throat. Shock, excitement and dread hit me at once. A whirlpool of happiness and sadness hit me in the face. But in true you fashion, it was all a joke. A prank to get an extreme reaction out of me. Well, you got me. Well played, my friend. Well played.

Thank you.

Real

A friend once told me, "Love is saying things that aren't true to make the one you love happy."

For a while, I thought that was true. Saying what a person wants to hear, within reason, sounded like love to me. Doing whatever it takes to make them happy.

But that's not true at all. How stupid I was. Love isn't lying to make someone happy. Love is saying the things you don't want to say, and meaning what you say at the same time. Love is being sincere in saying the things that make your stomach roll. Love, real love, is saying and doing everything you can to make the one you love happy, even when it breaks your heart at the same time.

But there's one more part to it. Real love is when doing all this makes you happier than anything else could, even through the tears of your broken heart. Real love is not dependant on love in return. That's what real love is.

And I am so very happy.

Pop

A so-so morning. A hectic work day. A fun lunch break. An amazing time after work. A job well done. An impending goodbye.

Then you drop the question.

"You want sushi?"

Some days are good, some are great. Some have awesome surprises, and then there was today.

An entire language at my fingertips but I don't have a single word to describe what you do to me.

Thank you for being you.

Thank you.

Fordwich

The day we went for wings with everyone and that day I visited you at work in the evening. These two days have something in common.

One street.

This little street I have never had a need to know it's name, much less drive on it. Now, it is among my favorite streets because of those two days.

Do you know the connection? Do you know why I think of you and smile every time I pass it by? I'll give you a small hint. Just think of my shirts

I hope you smile too.

Ideas

Hmm... Yesterday I had an idea.

I think I should start a new blog. A blog specifically for short stories. I actually have a bunch of ideas but I'm not sure if I want to post them here or on a separate page. A close friend of mine used to encourage me to write a novel but she stopped because I was adamant that I couldn't. Well, I still don't think I can but that's just because I don't have the experience writing fiction. The best way to learn is to just do it. It may be terrible at first, but maybe over time the quality of my writing will rise. Maybe then, my friend, I can take on the daunting task of writing a novel.

To all my readers I don't know personally, thank you so much for reading. It's very encouraging to see how often you check in for posts. And to you, my friend, your support and continued reading is the biggest support and encouragement I could ever ask for. You actually like my writing! It is so humbling to know that you're not just telling me that to make feel good. Thank you.

:)(:

I've missed you so much.

You're right there. I can see you. If I lifted up my arm, I could touch you. Sitting here, all I want to do is hold you. It's been so long.

I've missed you so much. I want you to tell me you missed me too. I want you to bury your nose into my shirt and tell me how amazing I smell. That's right, it's freshly washed. I want you to say you wish everything was better. I want you to say and do everything you used to. Yes, clearly I want way too damn much.

I have missed you so much, my dear friend. As I sit here, vainly trying to learn how to do my job, all I can think about is how close you are. Finally, I get to see your face again, hear your voice again. I'm happy. It will fade, I know, along with your presence, but it is true happiness.

I'm smiling, my darling. Inside and out. I hope you are too.

:)

Note To Self

My dearest D,

There will be days when your heart sinks. Days when, no matter how hard you try, you just cannot muster a smile, not a smirk. On those days, think of me. Think of our history, of everything we've been through. Remember all the laughs and smiles and hugs. Hell, even remember the kisses. Remember what we were. I wasn't the best, but for a time, I was yours, and you made me so happy. I know that deep down, that was enough for you. That's all you wanted. To make someone happy. Well, my darling, you did. Always remember that. And hold onto that as long as you need to. If that memory brings a smile to your face, keep it as long as you need it. As for me, I'm so glad you came.

I love you, my friend.

H

Come On

Sometimes, when you're being called out, it's a good idea to keep your mouth shut and take the blame. Don't point your finger at someone else. Don't play dumb. Don't give your weak reasons and excuses. Be an adult. Take responsibility for your actions or lack thereof. Everyone can come up with a quick reason why they did or didn't do something they should or shouldn't have done, but it's transparent and visible a mile away. If you fucked up, admit you fucked up,  take what comes of it and learn from it to succeed the next time. A noob like me shouldn't look more professional than those of you who have been doing this for years. Seriously, just man the fuck up. That goes for you too, ladies.

/rant

Napkins

Hey Small Fry!

I didn't forget you! On the contrary, I actually miss you a whole bunch! Maybe you could come out to one of those dinners you're sister and I are supposed to have someday with our friends. It would be so nice to see you!

Remember that time we were all on the phone and we played that game where we had to list a country or city or something that started with the last letter of the previous person's country or city? That was such an awesome night! We were on the phone for so long! Man, I was terrible! You guys whooped my ass! If we ever hang out again, I know a game you two will absolutely love. (And most likely whoop my ass in it as well.) I hope we get to play someday.

Anyway, I miss those good ol' days.

Miss you buddy.

Jarvis

He could totally be a Jarvis. ;)

Lobster

Visited Jarna at her store today! I miss her! She's the best!

Surprise

I'm sorry you're lonely. I am too. I think of you every day. A lot, actually. But it's that thought of you that puts a smile on my face. I have not doubted for a moment that you will not leave my life completely, that someday you will be back. You can call me naïve or overly hopeful but I believe it completely. Yes, I miss you a great deal, but I know that it is only temporary. Someday, somehow, we will be the friends we should be allowed to be. On that day, the loneliness will fade to a dull memory quickly forgotten. On that day, I hope you find some happiness. I know I will.

As for the other things on your mind, I think you're worrying a little too much. You're on track to do great things. You're already working in a great field with an awesome salary! And you're amazing at it! You have nothing to fret about, my dear. You are on your way to greatness. I can see it.

Keep your chin up, darling. You may not believe that happiness is a destination, but it is something you have to work towards. Keep reading for it. You'll get there. And I'm here to help you anytime you need me. Any time. Any place. Promise.

And keep smiling. You have the most beautiful smile.

I love you.

:)

Can't stop.

Age

Look at you. You did it again. Even as far outside my life as you are, you still blow my mind and make my day. How you can do that is a mystery to me. But I'm not in a rush to figure it out. Not as long as you keep doing it.

You fucking blow my mind.

Helpless

So tell me now, where was my fault in loving you with my whole heart?

-From "White Black Page" by Mumford & Sons

Old Times

I walked into the lunch room and looked into your old office. A habit I picked up back in April that I haven't been able to drop. My heart nearly jumped out of my chest. There, in your old chair, sat you.

A quick second glance proved my sight false. It wasn't you. It was a new hire with a startlingly similar hair style from behind. But she was too short to be you. And a little fat. You aren't fat.

Anyway, I have fifteen minutes to get my heart back down to normal rhythm.

greyman81

Sorry about that. It was worth a shot, you know? But I made sure Johnny won't stop playing. It's the least I could do. Whoop his ass, buddy. :)

Bored Photos

If a picture is worth a thousand words, your beauty in person is a dictionary.

Though the amount of cheesiness in that statement is illegal, it holds true. While a picture of you is more beautiful than any woman I've ever seen, it doesn't even come close to doing you justice.

I hope I see you again. I miss you.

Waiting

I can't wait.

Aslin

A week since I last posted here.

You told me to let you go. I told you I can't.

I won't.

A week gone by and I'm still here, whatever and whenever you need.