Skipping

I guess the biggest thing we have in common is that the only thing either of us cares about is that you are happy.

Meaning

I need meaning in my life.

I need my life to mean something.

At least to someone.

Sauce

I never knew a week was so long. And each day feels even longer somehow. I hadn't realized just how many things I tell you in a single day. Who do I tell when I spill sauce on the shirt you picked out for me when I'm on my lunch? Who do I tell when a stranger compliments me and makes my day? Who do I talk to when I feel like I'm failing at my job? Who else?

It's only been three days but you've been gone far too long. I miss you, my darling.

Mine

I want you to know that, despite our unique situation, I do feel that you belong to me. You're mine. You're MY Hannah. And I need you. I need you more than anything.

Knock

I wish you weren't going to move out when your mom sells the house, but you are. Then you will be gone forever.

Warm

Blankets? Why would I need those? Lying here with you, your skin pressed against mine, it's all the warmth I could ever need.

Old Times

I waited all night for you.

You never came.

The Sight of You

Sometimes, good days and bad days are separated by a single difference.

Apt

Press my nose up to the glass around your heart. I shoulda known I was weaker from the start. You build your walls, and I will play my bloody part to tear, tear them down. Well I'm gonna tear, tear them down!"

Babel by Mumford & Sons

Shell

You're sitting in a restaurant looking around the room, wishing you had what is on everyone else's plate.

My darling.

Look down.

You've got a lobster dinner.

Lily

He treats you like such shit. He's got you wrapped around his finger and he knows it. Why does your backbone disappear when he's around? Why do you give him near explicit permission to treat you like dirt? Why do you push away those who treat you like you deserve to be treated to be with him?

Why do you push me away?

Wish Upon

You want only him but I am only me. I wish I was good enough for you.

Perspective

It's all about perspective, isn't it? Sometimes life isn't necessarily teaching us something, but giving us a new way to look at what we already know. As we approach the end of the first year, I can't help but reflect back on what perspective I've gained on my life. Perspective gives way to knowledge and knowledge spawns realizations.

We've been through lots in a year, you and I. We both learned, we laughed, we cried, we rode a roller coaster of emotion and splashed our friends with the aftermath. But if I could change it for anything, I wouldn't. Maybe parts here and there, but not the core. Not the essentials. Not you.

Our year is almost ending but that only means a new one is beginning. Here's to you. Thank you.

Consistent

Good morning, sunshine.

I love you.

Broken

I am.

Want

I'm here when you need me. When you want me.

You/Me

I don't need you to be happy or excited or playful for me to remember that I love you. You're my Hannah. How could I ever forget?

You are still the best thing that ever happened to me.

Fairytale

Why do we always leave a bad end on good talks? Can't we ever end a conversation smiling? Go throughout our day riding that high? Have that smile return every time we think of each other? Why do we always set ourselves up for misery?

Or maybe it's just me?

Friends

Do these people really know me this well or is my face a book to be read by everyone? If I don't know you as a friend, don't ask me, "What's wrong?" You really think I'm going to tell you?

Expected

Everyone just forget I'm here for a while. It makes everything easier. I'm tired of being a pain. I'm tired of being me.

Rage

There's nothing wrong with you.

Package

If you want to know the difference between him and I, I figured it out.

He loves you despite your flaws, I love you including them.

Occasion

The longing will not fade. It only grows. My heart is dying inside my chest. It is rotting inside me, hollowing me out.

Clutching my chest, my knees hit the floor. Every breath a struggle. Pain rips through my body. Blood seeps from my lips.

Darkness enters.

Night

This loneliness is unbearable. The day rolls into night then back into day but it only gets worse. The darkness surrounds me, crowding me, pressing me, choking me. I scream for help but no one hears. No one wants to hear. I am alone.

Dying.

Slowly.

Random Call

Wow. Thank you so much. I have never felt so loved. My friend, you floor me.

Safe

Shake. Rattle. Thank God for no roll.

Tire exploded on the highway. This is my night now.

Change

Everyone keeps calling me Steve and I find it so weird.

Goat

Screw honesty. Some things are better left unsaid. My foot is most at home solidly lodged in my mouth.

Irresistible

Standing here next to you and all I want to do is kiss you.

Longing

I want it. I crave it. I need it. I cannot go through this life alone.

Here With Me

I see you in my dreams. Your beauty startles me. Never do I dream in such detail as when I dream about you.

Saint

If you were wine, I'd be a drunk. If you were a drug, I'd have overdosed. If you were a song, I'd be deaf.

But you are. I drink you in and I become giddy and stupid. I inject you into my veins and the world feels right again. I hear your voice and it is music to my ears.

The human condition has not enough senses or emotions that could allow me to accurately convey the way you make me feel. But if I really had to try, I would go with "happy".

Happy Valentine's Day, my dear, dear Hannah.

Await

A dreary heart gives way to dreary eyes. Fingertips on the edge of consciousness fail and I fall into the chasm of sleep.

My wait has ended in failure, but there is light yet to come. Your presence will rise with the sun and they both will give new life to my smile.

Goodnight, my dear friend.

Queue

If there is a girl out there for me, why can't I have her now? Why can't I be happy?

Purpose

I pour my heart out on these pages, but what purpose does it serve? Who does it benefit?

Maybe Someday

Maybe someday I won't be a coward. I won't hide in my room, afraid of what everybody else thinks. I won't run away in the car, staying out so everyone thinks I have a life. I won't curl up in a corner and cry out of sheer loneliness.

Maybe someday.

All

I fell in love with you the way you fall asleep slowly then all at once.

Anger

Kicked while I'm down. Spit in my face and walked away. I did what I've always done and now I'm paying for it.

Driving out of the driveway, I cursed in anger. I was actually starting to look forward to going out and you had to go and do that to me. Drop me down to my lowest as I walked out the door.

For once, I'm happy you won't be here all night.

I love you.

Contemplative

It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you. There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do.

Ever Present

Today's gonna be one of those days.

Begin the struggle.

Well Spent

I drove for a pretty long time last night. I spent hours on the road, most of them without a destination. But not a single kilometre passed without leaving a thought of you in my mind.

A long, happy night.

Home

Some days I like to stay at home, other days I like to go out. Some days I like to be alone, other days I like to be with people.

But I have one constant among these ever-changing preferences.

If I am with you, I am as happy as it's possible for me to be.

Choice

Here it is. The time of day I hate. It's that time when I have to go to sleep before you do. I like it better when you go to sleep first because I don't have to make the choice to say goodbye. I don't have to choose to stop talking to you in favour of sleep.

If I had my way, I wouldn't ever need sleep. I could stay awake until you drifted off into slumber. Then I would fill my hours, anxiously awaiting the moment you wake. I would greet you with a ":)" or "Good morning, Sunshine" to help you stay your day off with a smile.

But for now, I must choose to say goodnight. But I take solace in knowing that saying goodbye now means saying hello again tomorrow.

Goodnight, my Butterfly.

Lorrie

My dearest Hannah,

I love you. More than you may every know. More than anyone else loves you. More than anyone can. You are the subject of a love that has never known fatigue, and never will. You seem to forget what that love has been through to get to today. What can't that love weather? Maybe it's foolish of me to hope for that love in return, but my hope stays strong. That's something else of mine that has never tired. Hope. I hope a great many things, but you, my dear, are above all else.

I love you so much. I hope you truly know that.

Your Davis

Awake

You're surprised? Don't you know by now that I will wait forever and a day for you? Even if it's just to say goodnight?

But that's okay. It's a lesson that I like to teach.

Someday

Sometimes I think to myself, "I hope I find the right girl for me someday." Then I remember...

I already did.

I hope someday I'm the right guy for her.

Hook

Roars and screams, screeches and honks, the din of the city is music to my ears, a eurhythmic pulse under my skin. Lights and sounds assault my senses as I walk, words and images dance across my vision. Streams of people brush past me, only momentarily aware of my existence. It's beautiful.

A hand slips past my side and wraps itself around my arm. My body reacts as though this is as natural as breathing. I look to my right and see you. The noise and lights fade to nothing. They may as well not exist. There is only you.

I look down and match my stride with yours. Of course you skip and throw us off. We reach a crowd on the sidewalk and are forced to separate as we weave a path through the mass of people. But we escape and it doesn't take a moment for you to find my arm once again. I can't help but smile.

The most beautiful girl in the city and she's on my arm. The smile on my face can only grow.

Miss You

Just imagine that sometimes, your vision turned from colour to black and white. That's what it's like when you leave. When you're next to me, that's when I can see the colour of the world. When you're gone, the colour fades to black.

And whoever said "parting is such sweet sorrow" was an idiot. What's sweet about it? You're going away from me. All I feel is sad that you're gone. I immediately start thinking of the future and when I will see you next. Even that makes me sad because it isn't right now.

Who knows when I will see you next. All I know is that it isn't soon enough.

Rib

Some days are better than others. Today was a much better day than most. Why? Probably not why you think.

Was it the two awards I received fifteen minutes into my shift? No. Was it the promotion I received fourty-five minutes in? Not that either.

It was you. Wonderful, incredible you. All that you say and do, it just hits me with the biggest and best impact of life. Someone asked me recently what my life would be like without you. I don't ever want to know.

Long Time

If only I could have held you to my chest, let you breathe me in. Maybe then I wouldn't feel so incredibly low.

Are You Okay?

Sometimes, when someone tells you that nothing's wrong, nothing is actually wrong. So despite how quiet they may be or how much their demeanor screams "upset", they're actually fine.

This can change, however, if you insist that something is wrong and won't stop hounding them about it. What results is that they will become upset at you for not shutting up about it when they said they were fine.

The moral of this post? It's a mistake of the past. It's a lesson still being learned. It's an apology. Sometimes, even the nice guy fucks up.

Again with the Quotes

"You have a heart of gold."

Wow. You said that so matter-of-factly, like you really believe it. What have I done to deserve such high praise? I'm not nearly as good-willed as you may think. Not always.

Sitting across the table from you, I'm incredibly humbled. How do I go on like you didn't just shoot my spirits high above the clouds? Thank you, my friend. You are still proving to be a better friend than I ever imagined you would be.

From the Dark

"So what are we doing on Saturday?"

Such a simple question. Nothing special about it, really. Unless it was asked out of the blue with no prior hint of plans. Unless it came at the end of a long, rough day that refused to end. Unless it came from you, the best thing to ever happen to me.

And even though plans ebb and fail, the question still came. The thought still came to you to ask. Sure, it was the smallest of things, but it meant something. It held tremendous value to me. And that I will hold to my grave.

Deed

You're sitting next to me, just beaming. How are you not an angel? Your beauty surpasses anything known to man. You lean over to me and kiss my cheek. I know what you're trying to do. I can't help but smile, but I don't say anything. A few minutes later you lean over again and rub your nose against mine.

Memory floods my mind and my smile returns, uncontrollable and real. So much good is attached to my memories of you. So many incredible times.

I snap back to reality but the memories remain. How could I ever forget?

You ask me what's wrong. You say I'm acting weird and different. Maybe I am, but nothing is wrong. My mind is racing. I'm here. With you. What else could I possibly want?

I have my Hannah.

Can't Forget

Sometimes, nothing you do can make up for the mistakes of your past.

Green

I'm so jealous of him. He's such a fool. He has so much and he doesn't even know it. Or maybe he does but he doesn't care. Either way, he doesn't deserve you. And you don't deserve him. You deserve better. And because of you, I know I'm better.

I would treat you like a queen, not a servant. I would be proud and flaunt you in front of everyone in sight, not be ashamed and pretend I don't know you. I would show to both you and the world my immense love for you.

Why? Because it's you. How could I not?

Damn. Balancing on this fence can be very hard sometimes.

Hope Never Fades

Sometimes, hope is all we have. It causes us to make stupid decisions and to put up with what we normally would not. Hope is generally a very good thing, but sometimes, it can be crippling.