Out of the Ordinary...?

I just wanted to throw it out there that I had a fantastic weekend.

I had Friday off from work so I could go downtown to the Hard Rock Cafe and watch MgO tear the house down and embarrass all the other bands that played. I got to spend time with all my closest friends and not worry about anything, for a few hours at least.

Saturday didn't really happen. I was awake for a few hours before I fell asleep reading around 5pm. I didn't wake up until twelve hours later, early Sunday morning.

Sunday went as it usually does, with all it's ups and downs. The gueast speaker in church was really good, though he didn't speak long enough for my liking. Choir practice seemed to drag on and I was already in a terrible mood so the whole experience was slightly torturous.

I managed to double book myself Sunday evening so I was forced to choose between plans. As I really wanted to do both things, I knew that, whatever I chose, I would regret not doing the other, but I am happy with what I did do. I went out with my friend and talked for nearly five hours. Not all the subject matter was sunshine and butterflies but it is so good to be able to just sit and talk to someone sometimes.

Monday was basically a regular Monday. I spent all my concious time reading and as a result, I finished my book! The Eye of the World by Robert Jordan. Such a good book. I'm happy to finally start the second in the series, The Great Hunt. Being a slow night at work, I've already read two or three chapters.

I hope the few of you who may be reading this had good weekends as well. Here's to a good week of work/school/whatever you do and another good weekend to follow. Cheers.

:)

Lazy Mondays

It was just a lazy Monday afternoon. The blue sky outside gave the illusion of warmth, though I knew the truth. Without the blanket of clouds, there was nothing to protect from the harsh cold of February. Time withered away as I spent my last waking moments reading, unable to put my book down. I need to be going to bed soon. Like the stalker you are, you spied on me, sprawled on the couch under my blanket, keeping warm from the winter's cold.

You've always been so fickle. When I want you with me, you ignore me. When I'm well enough alone, you're all over me. Very rarely do we come together looking for the same thing, but we have our moments.

Silently, you come. My back is to the wall so you can't sneak up on me, but with my head in my book and your utter silence, I take no notice of you entering the room. Closer and closer, you creep, not a creak or a moan from the house do you stir. The slightest tug on my blanket draws my gaze from my book. I peer over my knees into your eyes staring up at me. I can't help but smile. You're so cute when you do that.

I know exactly what you want. Naps are great but always better when someone's there to keep you warm. You lay on my chest and I can feel your heartbeat. Your eyes get heavy as weariness gets the better of you and sleep descends, your purring a welcome sound in the silence of a lazy Monday afternoon.

I go back to my book, happy just to simply be. Many people don't understand the bond between pets and their owners, but it's there and it's real. You're my baby. My Gadget.

Appropriate

This has to be the theme of my life.

"I will hate the man you choose because he is not me, and love him if he makes you smile."
-Lan in The Eye of the World by Robert Jordan

"That Guy"

I feel like I've been a bit of a downer lately. I haven't meant to be. I've just been generally down and I guess I have a bad habit of dragging everyone nearby down with me. It's just hard to see the bright side of things sometimes.

As I've written before, my whole life is a roller coaster. The ups and downs can last as long as a month or as short as an hour. But the amount of time spent on one high or low doesn't diminish the stress it puts on me. The constant shifting of personal disposition wears me down. And that, in turn, makes me either hostile or depressed. Neither temperament is pleasant to deal with in another person, even a friend.

So I apologise to those of you whom I have aggravated or angered or offended hurt. It has never been my intention to do so. I'm working on changing how I operate but change for me is a slow process, though I suppose it is for most people.

Please have patience with me as I try to deal with all the shit I have gathered and stored in my life. I've never been very good at cleaning.

Infringement

I'm a creep.
I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.

I fucked it up again.

Why am I not surprised?